I think that your "dark poesy" thing is really working in the first chapter of the Numenorean story. Mairon is really frightening and impressive, probably more so than if he had just erupted on the spot, and the description of the garden is beautiful, melancholy and very ominous. Also, that POV thing, where you manage to make the Faithful sound like an obscure minority cult, is very good.
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Date: 2014-06-26 06:27 am (UTC)Mairon is really frightening and impressive, probably more so than if he had just erupted on the spot, and the description of the garden is beautiful, melancholy and very ominous. Also, that POV thing, where you manage to make the Faithful sound like an obscure minority cult, is very good.